Category: Lawyer Jokes
Published On: November 13, 2010
Well, sometimes lawyers say dumb things in court. They ask dumb questions but, really, are the questions all that dumb? Or are they just a quest for the truth? You be the judge
Published On: June 5, 2010
Need I say any more?
Published On: March 1, 2009
I just watched this very cute video on Youtube and thought I’d share it with you. It’s a song about the rigors of law school replete with appropriate drawings. Enjoy! You Can Follow me on Twitter.
Published On: October 5, 2008
With the election nearing, the economy in the dumper and too much acrimony for the American heart and soul to withstand, I think that some self-deprecating lawyer jokes are in order: A Lawyer and the Pope Arrive at the Gates of Heaven Following a distinguished legal career, a man arrived at the Gates of Heaven, accompanied by the Pope, who had the misfortune to expire on the same day. The Pope was greeted first by St. Peter, who escorted him to his quarters. The room was somewhat shabby and small, similar to that found in a low grade Motel 6… Read More
Published On: June 25, 2008
Another classic which was allegedly taken verbatim from an actual court case: The Court: In this case the request is made for the appointment of the psychologist for the performance of an IQ test. The court does not see the need for an IQ test since it appears to me that he is dumber than a fence post. Counsel: Has the court stated it in numerical terms? The Court: His IQ is less than zero.
Published On: June 18, 2008
A doctor and a lawyer in two cars collided on a country road. The lawyer, seeing that the doctor was a little shaken up, helped him from the car and offered him a drink from his hip flask. The doctor accepted and handed the flask back to the lawyer, who closed it and put it away. “Aren’t you going to have a drink yourself?” asked the doctor. “Sure, after the police leave,” replied the attorney.
Published On: June 5, 2008
I just found this fantastic Slowpoke cartoon by Jen Sorensen entitled “Slouching Towards Hypocrisy.” Amusingly poignant. To paraphrase former First Lady Nancy Reagan, “Just Say No To Tort Reform.”
Published On: April 2, 2008
Here’s what not to do at a deposition!!! I’ve been to some pretty contentious depositions but this is a doozy. Get your popcorn and enjoy the ride. Although this is fun to watch, I don’t recommend this type of behavior at a deposition or any legal proceeding — it does not foster good will and certainly impedes progress in one’s case.
Published On: March 19, 2008
Sometimes we, as lawyers, take ourselves a little too seriously. So, in an attempt to change that mind set, here’s a joke that someone forwarded to me this morning. It doesn’t make us look too good but it certainly made me smile! Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper has cheated him out of ten million bucks. His bookkeeper is deaf. That was the reason he got the job in the first place. It was assumed that a deaf bookkeeper would not hear anything that he might have to testify about in court. When the Godfather goes to confront the… Read More
Published On: November 29, 2006
Dear Readers, I, for one, think it’s healthy to laugh at oneself. Please feel free to add more jokes under the “comments” section of this posting. Lowell firstname.lastname@example.org www.steigerlaw.com The Lawyer and the Barber A barber gave a haircut to a priest one day. The priest tried to pay for the haircut, but the barber refused, saying, “you do God’s work.” The next morning the barber found a dozen bibles at the door to his shop. A policeman came to the barber for a haircut, and again the barber refused payment, saying, “you protect the public.” The next morning the… Read More